Movement

     After our recent house meeting, the residents are starting to want to dig deeper into the Bible. We have agreed to have a Bible study starting this coming Sunday night. I am nothing but excited about this opportunity. As I have said in several previous blogs that one of my main prayers is that they seek to know the Lord, and that the Lord will move in their lives and hearts so that they will want to and grow to know the Lord. Yes it will be a slow process, but we all at one time or another had to start our relationship with jesus somewhere. The guys are starting to really answer the challenges taht Jason, Stephen, and I are setting before them. They are starting to challenge themselves and each other in a way that I don't think they have ever before been challenged. Personally, actively, spiritually, and emotionally, they are answering the challenges set before them by house staff, councelors, and residential directors!
     As of recently, my trust in the Lord is being tested like never before sice arriving at Heartlight Ministries. In the past three weeks my family has had two deaths. My great uncle (on my dad's side), and my cousin (on my mom's side). The hardest part is talking to the parents and knowing that you can't be there with them since i am six hours away. All I have to go off of is their word that they are doing ok and will be fine. Yes, I believe them, but it is still hard! Family is family-plan and simple. Trusting the Lord that He IS watching over the family, not just mom, dad, and sister, but the entire family especially during this tough time is challenging because if I was able to be with them the compfirt would be evident.
     Then the Lord has is way of comforting you in times of trouble as He did last night during the Q&A event. Last night topic was Hill Billy Handgrenades. I dressed in some old jeans that were four sizes too big short cut blue jean shorts and a white t-shirt with bluejean material armband. I looked like and felt like I was back in the 'Sip....hahaha. Handgrenades you ask yourself?! What the heck are handgrenades! What it came down to was dodgeball with sponges that were soaked in waterdown water based paint. If anyone that knows me knows I love dodgeball, whether at DSU Intramurals or at O.K.R.A. Kamp against 6-12 year olds. it was an epic night and one of the mst fun Q&A's thus far. Even staff that has been there for a year or so was saying how fun it was! After the event was over we began throwing the paint at each other by the cup full! The Lord has His ways of keeping us young and telling us that everything is going to be just fine!
     "Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock."---Isaiah 26:4
     Please keep praying for Heartlight, the residents, and staff!




After Hill Billy Handgreades

Home at Heartlight

     Well it as been about ten days since I have updated the blog. I apologize to anyone who is reading the blog. Please understand from 7:15ish when I wake up until 10:30ish when I get to bed I am constantly busy. Whether it is in school with the guys, in meetings, trainings, cooking meals for the house, or working, I am constantly busy. My goal was to update the blog a couple times a week, but that was before I arrived at Heartlight and started working. In reality now, I think once a week is good, for there is stuff that I want to share as far as God working on these kids but I can't do to confidentiality. That is where the power of prayer comes into play! Don't stop praying-for the residents-for the staff-for me-and for Heartlight.
     My days off are noramlly Friday through Sunday, but this week they are Monday through Wednesday, meaning I will work 9 days straight starting tomorrow until next Friday. It is nice for a change, because the weekends are relaxing and filled with fun activities and different events, but I am excited about going with the guys to church on Sunday! As refreshing as the change is, I won't lie it is awesome having the weekends off to chill and watch football. I think that out of all the weekends off that this is the weekend I would like to have off the most so far. There area a group of guys going to a lake in Arkansas to camp. I was asked, "Paul, do you camp?" My reaction, "Ummmm-yeaaa!" I was quick to describe my Eno, what it was, and am letting them borrow it. They had never heard of an Eno!!!
     A group of about seven or so of us went to lunch today to a place called Beth's Cafe. IT WAS AWESOME!!!! The inside reminded me of Al la carte in Cleveland, but the food reminds me of a place you'll see on Diners-Drive In's- and Dive's. It was homemade food. The first "homecooked" meal I've had in six weeks or so now. Just sitting around and talking to the people reminded me so much of supper club and hanging out with friends in Clarksdale and Cleveland. A sense of peace and calm hit me that this is home for at least the next year, that these people are more than co-workers, they are family. As cliche as that sounds, it is true! For they didn't have to invite me to eat with them, but they knew I was off so they did! God has put me in Texas for a reason. As unsure of what that reason is when I took the job, I know I am going to be ok. I am working eeryday just as the kids are to 'win the day' to get better and become a stronger person.
     Last Wednesday, I gave my testimony during Bible study. It was one of the most nerve racking moments of my life I have to say. Why you ask? Imagine it, sitting in front of a room of residents whom you are supposed to be there to help guide, lead, and basically be a mentor for to and through their problems. At this point you are no longer their housing staff, you are equal to them: admitting to them your struggles through life, your up's and down's, high's and low's, and battles you have faced and continue to face daily. It is not an easy thing to do. once I began to speak the words just came out. I was talking yes, but thinking back on it I honestly do not know if I was in control of what I said. Closing the bible study, I used a verse that has helped me multiple times: Ephesians 2:4-10. For any of you that know me, know my struggles, battles and basically know my testimony. I honestly feel admitting my past and present guilts to the residents, I am now more connectible to them. I am more than the new staff but they can now see me as someone that wants to and is willing to help.
     As of this morning, I am officially done with my training and all that lacks now is a meeting with Blake and or Corry as far as an overview of the training and I will be officailly fully trained!!!

A Month Later

     Last Thursday, September 6th, was the one month anniversary of my being at Heartlight. Man how does time fly!! I rememebr packing, saying bye to family and friends, and making the drive to Heartlight as if it was only yesterday. In the month that I have been here I have already learned so many things about myself that I never even thought imaginable. Yes, ever since my interview, I had been told that this job would teach me things about myself that I wouldn't have ever thought possible. In all reality I didn't know what Corry, Blake (who interviewed me), Jo- a residential director for one of the girls cabins, and several other staff were talking about. I was then told the same thing once I arrived here on my first day.Well it took about a day and a half for me to realize that my patience would be tested just about every day. But more than the physical aspects I would learn, have learned, and continue to learn more about myself on a spiritual level more than I thought I could have. Every day- every single day- is a battle, a constant struggle to not only need to but want to get into the word. Yes I have slipped and fallen, I'll be the first to admit that, but what keeps me going is the simple fact that His love is so great for us that we are already forgiven for our sins. Yes I know this doesn't make sin acceptable, but in my opinion I am able to live my life to the fullest while having the confidence and knowledge that His grace is enough! I ask for your constatnt prayers for my having to lean on Him every day is definitely more evident in this past month and in the coming future than I have had to before.
     To follow up on my last blog post- my training in just about to an end. Once I have completed my first aid/CPR/water safety training I will be a fully trained staff. I will then go through a 30 day period in which I am "unofficially officially trained." This means I am fully trained but I am not allowed one on one with a resident out of sight of a fellow trained staff, excluding point times. In closing, please continue to pray for heartlight, Heartlight staff, myself, and the residents!
    

Training and Such

     As I sit on a couch at a fellow staff members house watching football I am thinking about this past week of what was and the future of what will be. My training is just about complete and then I will be 'officially' staff. By this I mean that until I am fully trained I am not allowed by myself (out of sight of a fellow trained staff member) with a resident. You might be asking yourself, "How long does it take to get trained?" Well honestly it only takes about three weeks which may seem like a long time, but when you are responsible for the lives of anywhere 4-8 residents at one time by yourself, I am willing to go through the training program without rushing. Although I have been here for four weeks, the first two weeks was break period so all the residents were not here and I didn't start training until last week for that fact. I am currently going through the training process with four other people. Eric Brewer-from Indiana, Kim Cook-from Houston, Hannah Brandenburg-from St. Louis, and Allison Kozloski-from St. Louis. I believe they were waiting on them to arrive before starting my training so there will only be one training at a time.
     Point times are were I truly feel I will be able to find out the hearts of my 'point time guys'. What is point time? Point time is your time at least once a week (usually more than once) that is spent one on one with your guys. This is where you get to know them and they get to know you. From the few points times I have listened in on the kids are open and willing to share their life stories with you and for the majority are wanting to change. I honeslty feel as long as they are willing, I will be able to relate to and help them in some form or fashion. As I stated in my last blog my hope is that I will fill accomplished when my time is done here and I have possitively affected the lives of at least one resident.
      There is one resident whom I believe I will have as one of my point time guys that is starting to grow from the ground up in his faith. Yes it is a slow slow process but as everyday comes so do the questions about the Bible, God, and what to read at night time. Right now, he is an open book ready to be filled with the knowledge, love, and awesomeness of God. He has even mentioned to Stephen and myslef to sit down with him a day or two a week and read and discuss the Bible. YESSSS!!!! That has been my prayer since accepting the job-even before i moved here. My prayer was for God to begin his miraculous works in the hearts of the residents that they will want to and long for his love and grace! How powerful and awesome! This only gives me hope and strength to keep on keeping on when the road gets hilly and bumpy. God has put me here for a reason and I am starting to fully recognize that. Yes, everyday is a challenge. Yes, this will be one of the-if not the toughest year of my life. Yes, I am prepared (at least I feel like I am). Yes, my strength in the Lord is stronger now than it has EVER been-which frankly I will need and want. Yes, this will be a rewarding year, as I will learn tons about myslef. My seatbelt is buckled and strapped on tightly. I am ready-I am the Lord's clay for the molding.
     Please continue to pray for the residents, staff and Heartlight as a whole.

Ephesians 2:10- For we are the workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, Which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.